Yeah, bad pussy. You've had it. The girl's so fuckin hot, you feel like you're gonna nut before you take your drawers off. You anticipate that sweet wetness... then it happens. A certain funk permeates the air. There are meat curtains, reminding you of the big Beef Bowl you had the night before. And the pussy's looser than a badly set up race car.
Appearances never give a indication of how good the pussy's gonna be. I am willing to bet that the best pussy you've had actually belonged to an average jane... or even that ugly chick you were bumpin for a while cuz her pussy made you cry... but you wouldn't be caught dead in public with her.
Pussy is like cars. Some look real fuckin good until you read through the spec sheet. You come to the realization that the car might not be very tight afterall. It's all a bunch of window dressing to fool you. Some cars look like shit, but drive like an electrical knife through Thanksgiving turkey.
When someone can bring together all the best elements, we're talking a neatly trimmed Hitler moustache, tight pussy lips, pussy muscles that can grip your shit better than a vice grip and so on. It's pure bliss. You know what I'm talkin about. Maybe you don't if you're into hairy JDM pussy.
Anyways, I peeped the latest issue of Import Tuner. Lo' and behold, there's a fine example of what I consider "good pussy." No, EXCELLENT pussy. Look at that CT9A Evo VIII. Almost EVERY aspect of the car has been touched upon. I don't agree with a few of the parts choices and the lack of a sound system - this cat may have not wanted a system - but I have to give it big ups because the extra mile was traveled to get this ride nice and tight. As tight as virgin pussy! (Is there any virgin pussy left in the world?) I hate to imagine what his credit card bill must look like, though.
Of course, as most mags seem to do nowadays, the other featured cars included two advertisers' cars including yet ANOTHER Greddy feature, a Honda that's been on the Southern Cali show circuit for like 10 years and WAY past its prime...
And a Nissan 240 that seriously lacks the glean of a freshly shaved pussy appropriate for a magazine feature. The article says that it's a masterpiece created from a blank canvas. What's with all those open holes all over the place? Is this a street car? Where the HVAC controls? Will this guy never drive this car when it's hot or cold? What if the windows fog up? Why are the turn and wiper stalks so worn out? Why is the interior so dirty? Look at the dash. It's fuckin filthy. One confused ass pussy here; maybe it can't decide whether it likes being fucked in the pussy or in the good ole asshole.
Maybe I'll put together a quick swap with some gay exterior shit and I can get that 240 into a magazine too. Then again, I'm not into bad pussy.
